Which came first, "The Word" or the "Message" it conveys?

Image based on photo by  Lauren Mcalary
under CC BY-SA 4.0 Deed license.

This is a very spontaneous, and probably very short article. It is so off-the-cuff that I really don't know how long it will end up being.

Over the last few years I have noticed people becoming more and more for lack of a better term "Phrase Sensitive". I had been involved with a few meetings lasting several hours each debating which terms are more appropriate for a given situation. Now before I go any further please do not misunderstand this is not the standard rebuttal about being overly politically correct. However, I do want to question why people seem to be so transfixed and often uncomfortable about terminology.

To my way of thinking the totality of the message you are conveying is much more important than the words you used to convey that information. In other words, it's the message that is important and not the phrasing. When I think about it by making things completely acceptable we are in danger of creating a society which does not know how to deal with diversity. Diversity is the very engine which drives evolution and change. People should not be afraid of this aspect of life. Indeed they should embrace it, because that is where new things are found out.

Do not pay attention to the individual words and phrases used in any monologue; rather look at the greater message. That is what you hold society and people accountable to.

I have a challenge for you. 

Spend a day saying exactly what you mean. Of course you can tell your friends and colleagues ahead of time that this is an experiment. You don't want to freak them out, but you do want to get them to pay attention to the complete meaning behind your words. Being blindly politically correct only serves to introduce ambiguity into communication. While saying specifically what you mean not only clarifies it for those around you but makes you pay attention to the message itself.

This could also have a very beneficial effect on everyone who engages with you, because it tends to lay bare routines we have for communicating quickly which are not very effective. It is an opportunity to really look at meetings and words.

Taking this a step further you could record your conversations and dialogue throughout the day. When listening to it back, pay particular attention to how you phrase things and the words you used. Did they match the idea you were trying to convey? Did you feel an emotional impact?

We are all so busy. The art of conversation and really conveying I thought is getting lost to some extent, because of two things essentially: 1. We tend nowadays to use the word that is appropriate but not accurate. 2. We make assumptions that are definition of the word is the same as the other persons. This is especially true when we deal with politically correct phrases. Have you ever been in a meeting and heard a phrase used over and over again which has never been truly explained to you. You have a "general idea"… And if that's the case other people may be in the same boat. This is not a good situation for clear communication and cooperation.

So which did come first, "The Word" or the "message" it conveys?

Take care Patrick